In case you missed it, the New York Knicks buried 14 threes and scored 72 points against the Boston Celtics… In the first half.
A bunch of the athletes tweeted about the Knicks’ hot shooting, but none made a spelling mistake more egregious than Roddy White’s.
Why the clerics playing dumb defense stop leaving shooters and just play straight up
— Roddy White (@roddywhiteTV) April 18, 2012
Yeah, those darn priests better crack down on defense, alright!
Who says linemen aren’t quick on their feet? If you do, you might want to think again after you read this tweet by Adam Carriker of the Washington Redskins.
A cop just knocked on my door and told me that my dogs were chasing people on bikes. My dogs don’t even own bikes..
— Adam Carriker (@BigPoppaPump94) April 17, 2012
And I already have a name for my unborn son…. But I don’t want any of you stealing it so I refuse to share it lol#sorry
— Donte’ Stallworth (@DonteStallworth) April 16, 2012
So, if he doesn’t want anyone to steal the name, he probably hasn’t stolen it from anyone. In other words, it’s probably unique and it’s also probably ridiculous.
But will it be as absurd as Jacquizz (see: Rodgers, Jacquizz), Dundrecous (see: Nelson, Dundrecous), Mardracus (see: Wade, Mardracus) or Jrue (see: Holiday, Jrue)?
I can’t wait to find out.
I assume most football players eat a lot, but it sounds like Brandon McDonald has an abnormal appetite.
Mane I’m hungrier than 16 fat bitches at a $.99 all u can eat buffet
— brandon mcdonald (@IMJUSBMAC) April 16, 2012
Making egregious spelling mistakes was cool in middle school. Once you reach high school, though, that fad dies.
Marcus Thomas of the Denver Broncos didn’t get the memo. Or maybe he’s just an idiot.
Wut it do world I’m finna hit dis Harry potter ride up universal lyfe. Cheaaaa
— Marcus Thomas (@MarcusThomas_79) April 14, 2012
Starring Justin Durant instead of Samuel L. Jackson.
I hate when people have gas on the plane man
— Justin Durant (@JDurant52) April 14, 2012
I mean, I understands your situation because I’ve been in your shoes before…
— Justin Durant (@JDurant52) April 14, 2012
But I ain’t tryna smell ya gas in this confined area bruh
— Justin Durant (@JDurant52) April 14, 2012
The nostrils can only withstand but so much torture bruh
— Justin Durant (@JDurant52) April 14, 2012
Then if I look at you dnt avoid the eye contact bruh…stand up to it like a real man
— Justin Durant (@JDurant52) April 14, 2012
No, it’s Chad Ochocinco.
“Career Day” at my daughters school and I’m speaking, you think Ray Lewis speech to Stanford was awesome, these 1st graders will cry today.
— Chad Ochocinco (@ochocinco) April 13, 2012
Here’s the speech he’s referring to.
I’ve never met anyone who does this.
I don’t brush my teeth for the week leading up to my dentist appointments. Gotta make em earn it.
— Tom Crabtree (@TCrabtree83) April 13, 2012
Make him earn it at your own expense, Tom.
Teddy Williams wanted to wish his daughter a happy birthday on Twitter, and his tweet was normal until the last sentence.
5 years go on this exact day and date God blessed me with a beautiful baby girl! Happy birthday to daddy’s little girl! I love u Dymiand
— Teddy Williams(@Fast_Teddy) April 13, 2012
Dymiand? First of all, who names their daughter Dymiand? Second of all, if you’re going to use the name, why not spell it the conventional way?
Blaming this on today’s society… My nephews test twitpic.com/990n8d
— Chad Ochocinco (@ochocinco) April 12, 2012
Pretty sure this doesn’t require an explanation.
I’ve never seen anything like this… check it out.
My shoe game DUMB instagr.am/p/JVn_JxG0GO/
— Von Miller (@MillerLite40) April 12, 2012
And Borat’s suit is black…………………. NOT.
Roddy White used the word “gay” in a tweet, deleted that tweet and apologized here:
Ok people I apologize for saying the word gay I know it’s a sensitive subject and a athlete of my stature should not use it
— Roddy White (@roddywhiteTV) April 12, 2012
Then, the wide receiver, who apparently has the highest IQ in the NFL (………… NOT), endorsed the word here.
This is pretty funny RT @ColeWorld50its ok. dont be gay and apologize for saying gay. because that’d be pretty gay
— Roddy White (@roddywhiteTV) April 12, 2012
It’s raining wherever Brandon Flowers is, and the cornerback of the Kansas City Chiefs does not plan on moving for a while.
Uh oooo is raining stupid hard outside..this bed is about to get all of me for the rest of the night
— Brandon Flowers (@BFlowers24) April 12, 2012
I’m not exactly sure why this tweeter told Chad Ochocinco he has class. After all, Ochocinco is the same guy who curses in nearly every tweet.
Regardless, Ochocinco’s response was pretty funny
I know, i masturbate with my pinky finger extended #classy RT @Padulo13: @ochocinco. You have class
— Chad Ochocinco (@ochocinco) April 11, 2012
Carlton Mitchell’s latest idea would definitely increase the worldwide obesity percentage.
I will not be impressed with technology until I can download food from the internet.#Shrugs
— Carlton Mitchell (@C_Mitch18) April 10, 2012
Put your NFL earnings toward the cause and your dream might come true.
I’ve never seen old identical twins. Do they all die at age 50?
— Darius Butler (@DariusButler27) April 10, 2012
Without trying to be blunt, no.
just put some water in the bottle and shake it up #blackpeople
— Carlton Powell (@PowPow_97) April 9, 2012
Am I missing something? What is Carlton Powell talking about?
The Mets are 3-0?! This is our year! #WorldSeries
— Eric Olsen (@EOlsen69) April 9, 2012
So, the Detroit Pistions are only eight games out of the playoffs with 10 games left. Olsen, you think they’ll win the championship?
Enjoy first place for the next 48 hours or so.
Thinking back on it my girlfriend in 5th grade was a gold digger she only liked me cuz I had a mechanical pencil no pun intended
— Anthony Allen (@Ant_Allen) April 9, 2012
Most famous bunny of all time? Easter? Energizer?…. Pamela Anderson?
— Pat McAfee (@PatMcAfeeShow) April 8, 2012
Do you think the Easter Bunny hates Tebow? #Rivals
— Pat McAfee (@PatMcAfeeShow) April 8, 2012
Personalized license plate just cruised past mi casa on this lovely religious holiday morning.. “HRT-ANL” #ThatCivicOwnerLovesTheBackDoor
— Pat McAfee (@PatMcAfeeShow) April 8, 2012
Just ironed a wrinkle free shirt cuz that’s how I get down
— Justin Durant (@JDurant52) April 8, 2012
He washes his hands when they’re clean. He eats when he’s not hungry. He vacuums when there is no dirt.
Justin Durant doesn’t always iron his shirts, but when he does, he makes sure they’re wrinkle-free.
Every time an athlete attends a sporting event as a fan, it seems, he sits field level, courtside, etc. Not Vince Young, though.
The Houston native attended opening day at Minute Maid park, and tweeted a picture of his seats.
Supporting our Astros let’s Go! yfrog.com/oeszozdj
— Vince Young (@VinceYoung) April 7, 2012
If Young’s seat selection doesn’t imply he’s not doing well financially, I’m not sure what would. I would be thrilled with that view, but as a pro athlete? Not so much.
Seats in that vicinity are selling for $48 on Stub Hub for Monday’s game against Atlanta.
Vince, you would have been better off staying home and watching on your 14-inch Panasonic.
I think I am now bilingual. I speak 2 yr old.
— Matt Schaub (@MSchaub8) April 6, 2012
Not much to say about this… other than good one, Matt.
One way to tell if someone is an illegal citizen..chck the way they drive…They drive under the speed limit & don’t acknowledge no honks
— Alphonso Smith (@AlphonsoSmith2) April 6, 2012
So Alphonso Smith is basically saying, “Reach the age of 70, and you become an illegal citizen.”
Y do people with chapped lips have the worse smelling breath
— Teddy Williams(@Fast_Teddy) April 6, 2012
Like Flavor Flav! I bet his breath smells like fake earring backs
— Teddy Williams(@Fast_Teddy) April 6, 2012
I knew a pretty girl in high school with extra chapped lips! Her breath smelled like stop sign poles
— Teddy Williams(@Fast_Teddy) April 6, 2012
What do fake earring backs and stop sign poles smell like? #WhyDoesTeddyKnowTheseThings
